A Bookbag for Chairman Mao

* Jennifer turns around to me all of a sudden.

"My son has to do a book report and it has to be a biography," she says. "And he picked Chairman Mao. One kid picked Tony Hawk. And like three others picked Nicholas Tesla."

"The teacher's really weirded out by it. I think I have to call her and tell her that my family believes in democracy."

She then asks me if I remember her telling me about a bookbag with Chairman Mao's face on it that her sister, who lives in China, bought and gave to Jennifer's son as a gift. I tell her that I do.

"Do you still want it? I'll sell it to you for $20."

I will be receiving this gift on Tuesday.

* We pick up the newspapers. The woman who looks like Precious tells us Happy St. Patrick's Day. The guy riding shotgun asks her where her green is.

"Oh, I got green socks on," she says. "But I couldn't find a green shirt to wear."

The guy who gives us the papers runs up behind her.

"I have on green underwear."