Monday, January 31, 2011

Pocket Protector

* It's my first Vanpool ride in a while. When I get on, Christina for some reason asks if I have Super Bowl tickets I can give her.

* Barbara makes Charlie adjust the heat on the van about 64 times.

"My feet are just so cold," she says.

John Krazinski's Uncle tells her that he can bring her a blanket.

"Well, what good will that do me? I don't want to put a blanket on my feet. I'll get the blanket dirty," she says.

* We're at the corner where we get our newspapers. The guy at the corner asks us how are weekend was. We then ask him how his was.

"I can't remember," he shouts. "I think I have to check my pocket."

He then cackles in glee and walks away.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Out of Context

* I took the bus home yesterday and sat in front of Barbara and her niece. I couldn't hear what they were talking about but her niece did call a Chinese place for takeout.

"I would like an order of Moo Goo Gai Pain and a Ceasar salad. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE SALADS!"

* Barbara's niece also took the van the next morning. Snippets of their conversation that I overheard:

"The only reason she's dating him is because he owns a hot tub."

"Auntie, I told you 18,000 times already, I like hardcover books."

* After Barbara and her niece got off the van, Christina turned to us in the back.

"So, what did she say about me today?"

Claire said she didn't say anything. Christina said that Barbara gave her crap when money was being handed to Charlie, which no one else seemed to have heard.

"I should get a discount for putting up with her."

When I left, Christina told me to say a prayer for her for dealing with Barbara. I told her that I'd do even better and light a candle for her at the Cathedral.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Reloading

* We're on Route 3, driving behind a truck. Someone reads the bumper sticker out loud.

"If I'm not honking, I'm Reloading."

At least three people practically cry from laughter.

* A car honks behinds us and cuts us off at a fast speed as we head into the Lincoln Tunnel.

"I bet he has to go deal drugs," Barbara says.

* We start to talk about Brett Favre's latest sex scandal. John Krazinski's Uncle says that he thinks that there might be more to the story than initially thought.

"Whatever happened to discretion," he says.